Talk--The Other 4-Letter Word

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Posted on: 3rd Sep 2014

Many casual relationships begin based on mutual physical attraction. Neither of you can keep your hands off the other and the giddy rush of feelings that can come with this phase of any relationship can be addictive.

However, once this initial crazy attraction phase starts to settle down, you will need a foundation to build from or you�ll soon find there�s not much holding the relationship together.

In addition to building trust between you and your significant other, knowing each other well will make commitment, and therefore true love, easier for the two of you to find.

Note that knowing each other well and building trust often go hand in hand--the better you know each other, the more trust you will have and the more trust building experiences you go through together, the better you will know each other.

Frequent conversation is key to getting to know anyone well, and your partner is no exception to this rule. The more you talk, the better you will know where your partner is coming from, how they think, and what is important to them in life.


Set Aside Time

Often, people mean to talk to each other but just don't get around to it. This particularly tends to happen with busy people. If you and your partner are always doing things together, there is often little room in the relationship for conversation. Thus, it can be important to set aside time specifically for talking with your partner.

While this sounds fairly straightforward, it is often difficult to actually implement. If you and your partner are serious about taking your relationship to the next level, though, you will find a way to work a couple hours of conversation into your schedule each week.

Switch off the TV and find somewhere peaceful to sit and relax. Play some music and just allow each other to talk about whatever is going on.

Note that focusing on conversation doesn't necessarily mean not doing anything other than talking. There are certain activities that, for many couples, are particularly conducive to good conversation. These include eating alone together, hiking or walking, and working on a manual labor project together. If you feel awkward just talking or still feel too busy, one of these may provide you a solution.

Serious and Silly

When you think about talking more with your partner, you probably think of deep, serious conversations. While these are important conversations to have, they are not the only conversations that are important. You will learn a lot about your partner's sense of humor, for instance, if you laugh and joke in addition to talking seriously.

Silly conversations can also make the serious ones easier. Very few people are capable of being serious all the time, or like being in a relationship with someone who is. Silly conversations lighten any tension that may spring up between you and allow you to have normal interaction that isn't forced or awkward.

It Feels Strange

If you aren't used to having a lot of conversation with your partner, it can feel strange when you first try to talk to one another. You can find yourself forgetting everything you'd thought of to say, or wondering what in the world you should talk about next.

The most important thing to remember in situations like these is to relax. Your partner is someone you care about deeply and are looking to build a long-term relationship with. So take a deep breath and jump in.

You'll find that conversation is easier than it sounds and a lot more rewarding, too. In the end, you'll know your partner better and feel like they know you better, which will build commitment and true love over time.



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